Search this site

The next time you walk by the Black Box in the freshly revamped Hess Center, you might just see an image of yourself embroidered and buried amid an aggregation of gold. Immense in size and exceedingly intricate, spanning seven feet, Lin Tianmiao’s opus currently sits in the Hilson Art Gallery. “The Golden Age” was created specifically with Deerfield in mind, to echo the memorable aspects of the Academy’s history and culture. With a son, Shaun Wang ‘15, at DA, Lin is no stranger to the Academy. Head of School Margarita Curtis gave a succinct portrayal of Lin, saying, “As Shaun indicates in his recent book on Beijing artists, his mother is one of the first female artists to gain international recognition, and one of the most accomplished and prolific artists currently working in Beijing and New York. Her works can be found in major museums such as MoMA, ICP, the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art, the Singapore Art Museum and the National Gallery of Australia.” Possibly the most initially striking aspect of the piece is its medium–gold silk thread which is sourced from the same supplier serving the royal Thai family. Lin chose to compose her piece out of this material as the culmination of her observations and experiences with the Academy over the years. Lin has come to the conclusion that the student body is “as precious as gold. It [the piece] comes from the depth of my heart. Your education is to ‘forge gold!’” Lin’s creative process and actual construction of the piece were inspired by, and aimed to be reflective of, the process of the formative journey of a Deerfield student–arduous and lengthy, concluding fruitfully. Lin took almost a year to “pick a clear vision from thousands of possibilities.” She read documents, scrutinized visuals and mulled over the amalgamation of the two. Some of the images she contemplated were embroidered into the two-dimensional background of the piece. Once the creative process came to an end, the challenge of the actual technical construction ensued. Production was painstaking, an intricate process, which Lin summed up: “[When] I finally came to the production stage, it took another year with 20 assistants, working daily without rest . . . around 800 working hours. I took it apart and then reconstructed it, again and again.” In addition to the embroidered two-dimensional background, the piece also features three-dimensional objects protruding from it. These parts are also entirely coated in gold silk thread, which was meticulously positioned using adhesive by the 20 assistants. Lin is aware that the piece is bound to evoke a range of responses. She hopes that observers will “keep an open mind. [People] should respond differently to my piece.” A common initial observation from the student body is the color combination of gold and blue, which are perhaps coincidentally the school colors of the Academy’s long-standing rival, Choate. Juan Cabrera ’16 provided a creative response to this questioning: “Perhaps the piece is blue and yellow because those colors make green, and that in turn means that two parts Choate equal one part DA. And that they will never be as great as us.” When prompted for any words of advice for the piece’s viewers, especially those interested in the arts, Lin concluded, “Art has no boundary, it has unlimited possibility.” “The Golden Age” is on permanent display in the Hilson Art Gallery and is definitely worth visiting and contemplating. Dr. Curtis concluded, “We are deeply grateful for the art piece that Ms. Lin Tianmiao P’15, recently donated to the Academy, a piece that took close to two years to design and execute. I hope all members of the community will take the time to observe and delight in this compelling new piece of our permanent art collection.”

The recent Ebola epidemic has created widespread panic across the globe, the virus having already infected an estimated 13,450 in West Africa and nine in the United States. Drastic precautions have been taken in order to control the transmission of the deadly virus. Although not nearly to the same extreme, Deerfield is going through an outbreak of its own: Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease (HFMD). Both students and parents received emails about the highly contagious disease; however, this is not the only nor the most dangerous epidemic that has occurred at DA. In the spring of 2009, there was an outbreak that warranted much more concern at Deerfield: swine flu. “It was unclear about how institutions could handle a major threat like that,” said Dr. Hagamen, Director of Medical Services. “New strains of flu could have a high infection and death rate. It was feared that that the flu epidemic might be similar to the last swine flu epidemic in 1918, when boarding schools had people die.” Early into the span of the epidemic that spring, Parents Weekend was canceled in order to prevent any further spreading of the disease. Dr. Hagamen went on to explain that it was soon clear that swine flu posed no major threat at Deerfield. But, in order to control a major disease outbreak such as swine flu, the correct planning and execution was required. It included the notion that if any students were to be infected and lived within three hours of the school, they were to be sent home. There was also room in the Health Center for students who contracted the illness, which was full for about two weeks due to the high infection rate. Compared to an influenza outbreak, HFMD seems quite mild as only an estimated 20 to 30 students have been infected. After the first email from Dr. Hagamen was sent out, which included details on the virus’s appearance at Deerfield, panic ensued within the student body. To avoid contracting the illness, many decided not to attend the long-awaited Sadie’s dance. “People are concerned, because everybody here is in such close proximity,” explained Chase Swinerton ’15. “We all go to the same locker rooms, the same dining hall, and we touch all the same surfaces. Because of that, boarding schools are a breeding ground for disease. We’re packed in here like sardines.” But students are not simply worried about missing class, sports, or other social obligations when it comes to contracting an illness. There is another specter. “In my opinion those actions are mostly socially driven,” Science Department Chair Dr. Dennis Cullinane stated. “I think people feel that as soon as you become sick, your name gets out there as being infected. It’s almost like a scarlet letter. When people know you have the illness [they] could make fun of you or avoid you for fear of getting sick as well.” Other students were not deterred by fears of catching the highly contagious disease. Countless dance-goers still participated in mosh pits and danced in sweaty costumes in close proximity with other potentially infected people. As Liam Gong ’17 stated, “Having fun with my friends, celebrating Halloween and going to one of the four Sadie’s Dances I will have in my life is something that I will risk getting sick for.” On October 22, on the Daily Bulletin, Dr. Hagamen posted, “Managing Ebola Risk at Deerfield”. In this report he added new perspective, while assuring the community that the risk of infection is extremely low. He again advised all students, staff, and faculty to receive a flu shot and take special care of personal hygiene. Also, he asked that all visitors who have traveled to Liberia, Sierra Leone or Guinea within the past 21 days contact the Health Center immediately. Dr. Hagamen concluded, “I will continue to carefully monitor these issues and will let you know should anything change. Despite the current anxiety over Ebola, it is my hope and expectation that we will experience a healthy and successful school year. Please feel free to call or email with any concerns.”

Recently there have been some incidents that have drawn the attention of students to the need for mutual respect and protection of privacy between teachers and students on campus. We at The Scroll believe that strong ties between students and teachers are essential to the Deerfield community. Transparency in these relationships is key. However, lately it seems that while the administration addresses student infractions of the respect policy in a transparent, disciplinary fashion, faculty aren’t always held to the same standard. Student actions often become quickly public to the community while the faculty does not seem to run the same risk. We see Deerfield as our home, a place where we will grow up, make mistakes and learn from them. It seems unfair that the respect policy is not applied equally to students and faculty, specifically that the privacy of students is not regarded as valuable compared to the privacy of faculty. While direct communication between community members does continue to be one of the most valued practices of Deerfield, the recent inconsistency in the degree of openness of communication, depending upon whether the offender of a school value is a student or a teacher, has left students feeling as if they are not regarded as equal members of the community. We at The Scroll understand there is a difference in expectations and responsibilities between adolescents and adults in many cases. But in the case of respect, the expectations and responsibilities should be the same. In order for students to trust adults on campus and vice versa, the administration must respond to infractions of the respect policy in a consistent manner, whether the offender is a student or a teacher. Complete transparency and equality of treatment in response to infractions of the respect policy are essential steps towards making this campus feel equally safe for all its members.

This fall, Northfield Mount Hermon dropped its football program, citing a decrease in interest due to potential injury concerns, especially concussions. All this comes against the backdrop of the recent revelations that these “brain bruises” lead to later life dementia and other mental illness. Deerfield has also been investigating concussions. With the recent use of IMPACT testing and more rigorous analysis of recently injured students, the school aims to support its concussed athletes as much as possible. Robert Graves, head athletic trainer, has been observing and treating brain trauma in Deerfield athletes. “Concussions are pretty regular at Deerfield,” Mr. Graves said. “Depending on the season, we get, on average, at least 10 per athletic season. They don’t only affect students’ ability to play a particular sport, but also every area of their life. Some may feel all right, but upon cognitive exertion the student begins experiencing a headache, or sensitivity to light and noise, or fogginess.” Many students, fearful of the potential consequences of missing class time and endangering future cognitive function, have grown fearful of playing contact sports such as football or ice hockey. Courtney Morgan ’16 dropped football this year after playing varsity last year. Morgan said, “My parents and I are worried about injuries, especially to my brain, and they don’t want me risking my head to play football.” Fisher Louis ’16 recently left on medical leave after being diagnosed with his ninth concussion. At one point he even sustained three especially bad ones in a four-week span. “Since January,” Louis reported, “I’ve been having terrible headaches, which make it really hard for me to work, and sometimes read. I’ve visited several doctors to try to figure the problem out; I haven’t fully recovered because of stress from school and other reasons that the doctors aren’t sure about. One possibility is that my brain has gotten fragile, kind of like a bone that’s been broken a lot, and that now it’s really easy for me to sustain another concussion.” Louis expects to return to Deerfield before the end of Fall Term, but will not return to playing contact sports, at the minimum, until next winter. Cases like this and research on the potential long-term effects of brain bruises have raised several questions. Namely, at what point should students stop playing contact sports? Former Harvard football player and WWE wrestler; Chris Nowinski, now executive director of Sports Legacy Institute, which aims to solve “the concussion crisis by advancing the study, treatment, and prevention of the effects of brain trauma in athletes and other at-risk groups,” offered his opinion while speaking at Deerfield on November 4, saying “It should be a health concern. There is a fine line between playing sports competitively and lifelong damage. You have to weigh your options.” According to Mr. Graves, “It is up to the discretion of the families. Doctors make suggestions, but generally when a sport begins to endanger a student’s future, then the athlete needs to consider switching sports.” With a heightened awareness of the symptoms and outcomes of concussions must come a change at the very root of the problem—the playing fields. Mr. Nowinski stressed the importance of alerting medical technicians to the most common symptoms of concussion sustainment, including dizziness, imbalance and head pains. Even Mr. Nowinski, while fulfilling his various professional athletic roles, fell prey to the detrimental athlete culture of minimizing a knock, which results in overlooked diagnoses. He recounted that after sustaining a head injury that, even “though [my] head was throbbing, [I] lied and said [I] was okay because [I] thought that was the only acceptable answer an athlete could give.” An increase in data and analysis programs, as well as increasing awareness among students and school administrations, is sure to lead to a push for greater safety and a reassessment of programs.

Most students receive their acceptances to Deerfield Academy in the mail. Julian O’Donnell, currently a freshman, found out “in a hut in Nepal at 10,000 feet.” After their yearlong sabbatical trip, Philosophy and Religion teacher Michael O’Donnell, English teacher Sonja O’Donnell and their son Julian ’18, are full of stories and lessons learned. From Oxford, England, to Melbourne, to Kathmandu, they covered 17 countries during their circumnavigation of the globe, which Mrs. O’Donnell said “was a year on the study of contrasts.” Oxford University was their first stop. Mr. O’Donnell reminisces, “One of the things I liked the most was that we got to take classes at Oxford, and it was fun to be there for 10 weeks, to absorb the culture, and also to study the philosophy of physics. Which is something I don’t do here, in no way do I specialize in it. But it gave me the chance to study something I like, to be a student again.” The reason behind their thrill-seeking exploration of the world was “to break the cycle,” Mrs. O’Donnell explained. “It was time to step out of the relentless pattern of existence.” After 15 years at Deerfield, the O’Donnells wanted to trade their predictable daily routine for the chance to satisfy their intellectual curiosity. Escaping from the boarding school schedule was “invigorating,” Mr. O’Donnell said. “The eight months we spent on the road felt like years in ‘Deerfield time’—and now it’s almost Thanksgiving, but it feels like I’ve been here 10 minutes, whereas, weirdly, that year felt very stretched out in a good way. It was great to have that time for the three of us to spend together.” While on sabbatical, they trekked to Mount Everest’s base camp, a feat that Julian O’Donnell is the youngest person to have ever accomplished. Mrs. O’Donnell said of that climb, “That was a great physical, spiritual, but also mental challenge.” Another adventure was helping the impoverished people of Haiti, the poorest country in the western hemisphere, which “taught us empathy and what it is to walk in another’s shoes,” said Mrs. O’Donnell. “The facts learned on the trip were really important, but what really is valuable to me as a teacher is having practiced mindfulness for an entire year,” she said. Although away from Deerfield, the O’Donnells kept in touch with the school. Mr. O’Donnell explained, “We connected with alumni, parents and former faculty in 10 or 11 countries. So it was kind of fun to be connected to Deerfield throughout the entire trip.” Julian O’Donnell did some of his schoolwork over Skype with a tutor. Now at Deerfield, O’Donnell can fall into the typical student routine, but he is able to apply lessons he learned while away. On the impact the year had on him, he said, “I definitely think about things more. Every day was different on the trip, and every day I would experience something new and awesome. I learned to appreciate the connections I’ve made with people, to be present and experience everything.” Regarding how her own teaching style has changed since her adventure, Mrs. O’Donnell said, “I feel calmer and more patient. I’m more possessed of my skills, and what I think students need. What I want to do is all that I saw in my head. A sense of mindfulness is what I’m trying to bring to my teaching. Be prepared to lose your sense of normalcy because the world is a wild, crazy, amazing, vast place.” After such a momentous year of traveling, the O’Donnells concluded, “We are deeply grateful to Deerfield, the administration and Mr. Jacobs for allowing us to share this enriching experience.” For more details on their journey: check out their blog: http://theother3corners.org .

Dear Reader, This past Thursday, I quickly scrolled the length of the page one last time, held my breath, then clicked. My Early Decision application was submitted. If I later spot a glaring typo or have a sudden epiphany, it is too late. My fate is sealed. I felt a profound sense of satisfaction . . . and fear. But I also feel sadness and disbelief. It seems like it was just yesterday that I was sitting at home over Thanksgiving Break, filling out prep school applications. And now, I have officially completed the first final step in the process of finding a new home. Though I toured nearly a dozen colleges this summer and lost sleep over preparing for college admission tests, the end game all seemed so far off. I have been in denial. I cannot avoid the fact that we are at the beginning of the end. And though any good graduation speaker will tell you that leaving high school is just the “end of beginning,” I have to disagree. Our grade has only just begun to shed the self-consciousness that sometimes inhibited us from building meaningful relationships and from making decisions that would truly have made us happy during the first few years. The places, people, and tasks that seemed so daunting when we first began are now non-events. We finally feel comfortable in our own skin and with the roles we have grown into at the Academy. And yet now our time is running out. Are we ready to leave? This “forever” that I imagined while filling out my boarding school applications didn’t include graduation. Have we accomplished everything that we set out to accomplish? Before it’s too late, let’s strive to make a few more friends, mend fences and set in place lifetime soul mates. In just a short time we’ll be out the door. All the best, Henry Cobbs

It’s no secret what happened a few weeks ago on campus. Between the one student who withdrew from Deerfield facing disciplinary action and the seven students who faced the DC, most members of our community are acquainted with someone involved in what has been widely referred to as “the drug bust.” I was one of the seven. And one of my good friends was the one. Despite the fact that I was as close to the situation as one could be, I still don’t know what to think. I continue to ask myself hard questions. Is it fair that seven students had to go before the DC, while every student who wasn’t implicated by the confiscated phone received amnesty? Is it right that some of the worst drug offenders on campus simply had to put their “stashes” in a cardboard box, while seven of their peers, some of whom had violated the drug and alcohol policy just one time, were suspended? I don’t know the answers to these questions. It makes sense that the administration took action against the students for whom they had incriminating evidence, but why did they stop where they did? Why didn’t they confiscate everyone’s phone? There has been a lot of discussion on campus regarding the privacy aspect of this case. Many members of our community are pondering the following: Why was the administration allowed to confiscate a student’s phone and computer? What gave the deans the power to search through the private property of a student and use it as evidence in a disciplinary hearing? Is that fair? Is that even legal? After a discussion with Dean of Students Amie Creagh, I found the answers to some of these questions. Yes, the school has the right to search through a student’s private property if there is “reasonable suspicion” of misconduct. However, Ms. Creagh stressed that the administration only ever does this in exceptional circumstances. The two examples offered were drug dealing and compromising photos, both of which are punishable by law. At this point, you might be outraged. You might be thinking to yourself: “The school should not have the right to my private property. This is not what I thought I signed up for when I came to Deerfield.” Or you might be neutral: “What do I care if the school can go through my phone? I have nothing to hide.” You might even be relieved that the school is equipped with the tools to combat drug use and other illicit activities on campus. Wherever you are on this spectrum, take a moment, and realize what could have happened. Worst-case scenario: if Deerfield were a public school, the first thing the administration would have had to do if they were forced to confront a case of drug-dealing on campus is call the police. Instead of going home to finish out the remainder of the year, the member of our community who withdrew could be in a juvenile detention center, and have a criminal record to contend with for the rest of her life. Instead Of making statements to read in front of fellow classmates and teachers on the DC, the seven students implicated on the phone could have had to make statements to the police. Even some of our peer schools have to involve their local police each time there is a drug offense on campus. And not just for cases of dealing; if any student is caught using drugs, some prep schools, like Exeter, for example, are required to contact the police. With this information in mind, it’s worth considering that Deerfield might actually be protecting us from a harsh reality that many of us have never even considered. Unfortunately, as is true for many high schools, drug use is widespread at Deerfield– widespread to the point that people who are caught consider themselves unlucky, rather than wrong. We as a community need to address the why of the issue. Not the who, what, where, when, or how. We cannot hope to solve this problem unless we understand why kids are using. Are there addicts on campus? Are kids bored? Are they stressed? Is it a result of this generation of teenagers feeling like they are invincible? Or are some kids using to cope with personal issues that they’re struggling with? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then the drugs are not the issue. It’s the feelings, thoughts and pressures that drive people to use. The stark truth is that the majority of people using drugs are only worried about getting caught and having to explain the dreaded three-day suspension to colleges—not with the moral issues involved. And yes, many kids who face a drug-and-alcohol DC will never use these substances on campus again. But off campus? You can be fairly certain that some users will go home for break and indulge over the duration of their “freedom.” Why does the student body react to a drug-and-alcohol DC differently than a DC dealing with the school’s honor code? Why is smoking a joint different from cheating on a test? Or telling a lie? I think it’s because we, as Deerfield students, consider lying and cheating immoral. Drug use, on the other hand, is widely viewed as acceptable. We’re teenagers, and rebelling comes naturally to us. The percentage of kids who experiment with drugs before graduating from high school is huge—so, do we consider using drugs to be immoral? No, because it’s so often seen as typical. This is why a change needs to be made. The way our community thinks about drugs needs to be altered. Restorative measures need to supplement punitive ones. We need more conversations and fewer DCs. What many people don’t know, however, is that we have already started down that path. I think it is important that the school community be aware about what course of action the school is taking to address the drug problem on campus before it judges the administration for its decisions. It is clear that the administration, as well as other leaders in our community, are working to combat the drug problem with measures that surpass the merely punitive. And while we have a long way to go, we are taking the right first steps. The administration has spoken on its plans for the next few months: •Ms.Creagh’s comments at school meeting encouraged students to get help from the Health Center. She hopes she made it clear that she understands adolescent mistakes, as she made a lot of them. More than anything, her hope is for Deerfield students to be healthy and grow healthy habits when they’re here. •The administration offered an amnesty/”reset” so that kids could begin to remove drugs and alcohol from their lives freely. Doing right after wrong is a big point of emphasis for those in the Deans’ Office because it shows growth. •The administration held a faculty meeting just after these drug events to help colleagues support students who may be struggling with drugs and alcohol. The hope was to raise both awareness and support. •The administration is going to meet with proctors and peer counselors about drug and alcohol use on campus so they can refer students to the Health Center for help. •A group of students on campus who’ve been involved with drugs and/or alcohol will meet with younger students and health classes to talk about the very stressors I articulate in this article. Ideally, this impacts a full “generation” of DA kids, who then move on to handle stress and boredom, for example, without harming themselves with drugs and alcohol. •Ms. Loftus is tapping into a similar pool of students to work with the Circle of Trust / Gordie Foundation. •The Deerfield Magazine plans to write an article about use on campus that highlights these very leadership moments for former users, sharing their positive stories so that others might then learn most effectively from their mistakes. •Ms. Creagh has emailed all parents in an effort to partner with them in these important conversations about use, reasons for it and ways to deter it. If our conversations here at school are mirrored and echoed at home, the message might resonate more loudly with students. •Ms. Creagh met with the Student Life Committee of the Board of Trustees last weekend to talk about ways they might get involved and help. •The administration rearranged the full academic schedule on November 13 to accommodate Chris Herren and Project Purple. We hope to show this ESPN 30 for 30 prior to Chris’s visit: http://espn.go.com/espn/espnfilms/story/_/id/6961212/unguarded •On January 28, Dr. Mark Stonkus will be our School Meeting speaker. (One of Deerfield’s former users has worked closely with him already.) Dr. Stonkus runs FitOut, a group that focuses on peer pressure and some of the other reasons kids may choose to use drugs. Before his visit, this current student/former user will distribute a survey of the student body so we can begin to gather data on use. We’ll use this data to measure our progress in addressing the problem. After the FitOut presentation, students will be asked to participate in student-led, “grassroots” monthly meetings, each of which focuses on a different cause of use. •Ms. Creagh has reached out to two recent graduates who were involved with drugs and/or alcohol to see if they might come back to talk with seniors in the spring. It would augment our meeting about the 16-day rule in ways that would probably be more impactful.​

Due to the extreme stress that students experience from grades, Deerfield has decided that teachers will not show grades to freshmen students until the end of the term. While sophomores, juniors and seniors will still receive marks on assessments and midterm grades, the freshman class will not. They are encouraged to focus more on teachers’ comments, and move away from the attention that Deerfield students passionately apply to grades. We here at The Scroll believe that Deerfield’s decision to give qualitative reports emphasizing different skill sets, rather than number grades, for freshmen fall midterms will enhance the learning experience of the student body in upcoming years. The change enables freshmen to focus more on the process of learning than on a number that may inaccurately reflect a student’s efforts. Especially during the first half of a student’s first term at Deerfield, it is difficult for all aspects of a student’s efforts and progress to be encompassed by a single number. Our mode of academic evaluation for freshmen is rightly starting to emphasize that the learning experience is a two-way discussion with room for mistakes, reflection and improvement, not a one-way handing down of judgment. Can preventing knowledge of one’s grade cause stress for a student? Perhaps, but the Scroll Board encourages freshmen to embrace this more liberal style of evaluation, at least for their first term at school. We believe this is Deerfield’s attempt to establish a healthy attitude towards academics in freshmen early on in their Deerfield careers—an attitude that focuses on improving skills, rather than raising numbers. We here at The Scroll have learned through many years of experience that though it may seem otherwise at times during one’s career at Deerfield, the true value of a good education ultimately lies in the means, not the ends.

Describe A Typical Rehearsal Tarek: We start, we do warm-ups, and then 15 minutes later, Tomas shows up. After that, Will gives a little lecture about not being late. Then we start singing, but everyone is singing whatever they want. Juan starts busting out Beyoncé, and we have to calm Juan down. Then we actually start.. Your Favorite Part About Being A Mellow-D? Michael: Probably wearing my penguin suit. Henry: Singing without instruments makes me listen more to everyone, instead of just focusing on what I’m doing. If You Were Stranded On An Island, What Three Things Would You Take With You? Taro: A pot, a Nutrigrain bar and a water bottle. Tomas: A piano, a very attractive woman and a boat. Liam: Starbucks coffee, Los Angeles and a spaceship. How Did You Get Into Singing? Ken: Throughout middle school I was really jealous of my brother, so I started singing. Will Darling: I started singing at a very young age, I think, simply, because I liked to perform. Actually no, that’s a lie; I actually started singing to meet girls . . . But over time that grew into a love of music, of the emotions that can be conveyed through it. What Is Your Happy Place? Will Blauvelt: On a medium-sized sailboat going top speed and skimming the water with my hand. Michael: I’m happiest playing music, whether it’s on stage or in a practice room. What Is One Dream You Have For The Future? Juan: I want to be a singer. Taro: To keep dancing as long as I can. What Is Your Spirit Animal? Michael: A dog. I generally get excited easily when I see something cool. Matt: A puppy, really friendly and outgoing and energetic. The Mellow-DS strike a pose after a Parents Weekend performance. What Is A Unique/Weird Fact About Yourself? Adam: I was born with six fingers on one hand. [The sixth] was removed. The doctor, when he removed it, asked my mom if she wanted to save it. Vishawn: I am sort of obsessed with Beyoncé and I can probably finish a whole tray of vegan brownies all by myself. What’s The Best Piece Of Advice You’ve Received? Will Darling: Be happy with yourself and don’t define your life on someone else’s terms. It took me a while to realize that. But when I did, my life got so much easier because I could focus on what really made me happy. Liam: It’s good to be foolish; it’s good to try things and always stay hungry and never be satisfied, and to keep on pursuing your dreams. Seniors, What Will You Miss Most About Deerfield? Matt: There’s just something nice about the community here, like walking down Albany Road and saying “hi” to people; I’m going to miss that. Will Darling: I can’t choose! Every person on campus, the land, the River-but I’m gonna miss the Mellow-D’s a lot. It wasn’t until the Mellow-D’s performed at Revisit Day that I thought, “I have to come here and be a part of that.” It’s been more than just fun, it has helped me grow as a person, and I’m gonna miss the guys and the singing and the music and the happiness that we try to bring to the community. Superlatives: 1. Most likely to be late to every rehearsal: Tomas. 2. Most likely to flirt with one of the Rhapso-D’s: Ken. 3. Most likely to break out into song in the Greer: Juan. 4. Most likely to be in the practice rooms on a Friday night: Michael.

In early October, a group of six Deerfield students boarded a plane for Amman, Jordan. Accompanied by English teacher Anna Steim, Global Studies Director David Miller and Chief Financial Officer Keith Finan, the student delegates—Serena Ainsle ’16, Arianne Evans ’16, Hannah Casey ’15, Ally Edwards ’17, Quentin Jeyaretnam ’16 and Jeffrey Sun ’17—were headed to the King’s Academy in Jordan to represent Deerfield at the 2014 International Round Square Conference. Round Square is a global association consisting of more than 100 member schools, hailing from over 80 countries, which all share a common philosophy and goal. These member schools seek to instill in their students a dedication to personal development and responsibility through service and experiential learning. This development is achieved by supporting the six pillars— or IDEALS— of Round Square: internationalism, democracy, environmental stewardship, adventure, leadership and service. In the words of Nahla Achi ’15, a Round Square conference alum and current committee member, “The goal of Round Square is to bring together students from around the world and shape them to become future leaders.” Once the Deerfield group arrived in Jordan, before meeting the delegates from the other attending schools, they began the trip with a two-day cultural experience. This “pre-conference” was designed by Ms. Steim, who taught at King’s Academy for two years. The intention of this experience was to allow the students some time to process and adjust before the conference started. They visited various important cultural and historical sites in Jordan and undertook reading to familiarize themselves with the region. During this immersion experience, Mr. Miller, usually one of the leaders of the Round Square trips, reported, “The students were participating in seminar discussions just like you would around a Harkness table at Deerfield, except we happened to be in a marketplace in Jordan talking about how what we were seeing related to our understandings and misperceptions of the Middle East.” This idea of misperceptions was related to the conference’s central theme, which was Al Salamu Alaikum, Arabic for “Peace be with you.” Every year the conference changes its location and theme, which usually serves as a means to focus the conversation on a specific issue or topic. According to Mr. Miller, the topic was the biggest difference between this year’s conference in Jordan and last year’s conference in Florida. He compared the two, saying, “The topic of this [year’s] conference was much more urgent and relevant, thinking about peace and thinking about stereotypes in the Middle East.” Mr. Miller noted the powerful impact that the location of the conference, during such a critical time in international events, had on the discussions and the conference as a whole. Jeffrey Sun ’17 also commented on the impact of the location: “The fact that the conference was situated in Jordan, surrounded by many major ongoing conflicts, added magnitude to it. It provided a sense of urgency, an overwhelming feeling of responsibility that you can’t just simply push away.” Sun added, “During the week of conference, Pakistan began its first round of airstrikes on Syrian ISIS targets, the UN proposed a reconstruction project in Gaza, and 47 civilians were killed in a bombing incident in Yemen.” With these conflicts occurring in close proximity to Jordan in the weeks leading up to the conference, safety became a major concern for a lot of the member schools, including Deerfield. “In the end there were 10 schools that decided not to go this year,” Mr. Miller said. “My primary job [as the Director of Global Studies] is to advise the school on assessing the risks of travel.” In researching the situation, Deerfield was extremely careful. The Global Studies Department spoke with contacts in the U.S. State Department and people in Jordan, and even ran the entire itinerary through a team of security analysts. Mr. Miller added, “The challenge is the geography; the Middle East is very small, so Syria and Iraq have borders with Jordan; and the violence going on in the West Bank was in locations where, if you took binoculars from some of the locations we went, you might be able to see [it].” However, Mr. Miller wanted to emphasize, both to the students and to the parents, that in going to Jordan they would not be entering a war zone: “At the time that we were going, the risk of things happening in New York City or New Jersey was more elevated than they were in Amman, Jordan.” Nonetheless, the prospect of the trip was worrisome to many parents, including Mr. Miller’s, so the school remained open to canceling the trip, no matter the cost to the school, up until the moment the group boarded the plane. After moving past the logistics and the safety concerns, the group became fully immersed in all the activities of the conference. Through lively barazza discussions, keynote speakers, adventure trips to surrounding cultural sites, and service projects, the students and faculty of the 60 different schools in attendance were able to interact and create meaningful relationships. Quentin Jeyaretnam ’16 said, “The primary objective of these discussions, and of this conference, was to create understanding and connections between some of our generation’s shakers and movers.” Sun added, “The essence of the conference lies within the intellectual discussions between the student delegates.” And Hannah Casey ’15 said, “I really felt like we were building a small international community.” A large part of Mr. Miller’s focus on the trip was concentrated on developing Deerfield’s relationships with other member schools. “A lot of time,” he said, “was spent trying to make partnerships that would create more opportunities for students from other locations and also from Deerfield, to get a more robust global education.” Arriving back on campus, Arianne Evans ’16 declared, “Round Square is a unique opportunity,” different from any other Deerfield trip, “because it allows students to learn about global issues from the perspective of peers our own age.” Ally Edwards ’17 agreed: “Round Square is different from other global studies trips because it gives you the opportunity to meet students from all over the world as well as hear their opinions and learn about their cultures.” Now, in an effort to promote the IDEALS and share the experiences of both the 2013 and 2014 conferences, the committee is trying to determine the role of Round Square on the Deerfield campus. Maddie Nelson ’15 said, “With many clubs, the new center [name this] and other extracurriculars on campus that pertain to all of Round Square’s ideals, it has been difficult for Round Square to find its niche.” While in the process of determining its own role, the committee has also developed a few ideas that it is considering for the future of Round Square at Deerfield. One is to hold a small conference at Deerfield and invite a few local schools to explore the Round Square IDEALS and discuss the issues that the program currently faces. The committee is also looking to expand the ideal of adventure on campus, possibly by implementing an adventure experience over Long Winter Weekend. According to Mr. Miller, “Figuring out where the direction of Round Square is going was a big focus of our time at this conference; and as the organization grows, they are evaluating what they want to be as an organization and we are evaluating how we can take advantage of those opportunities.”

Over the past three years, the Deerfield girls crew team has looked to Claire Collins ’15 to drop seconds off their race times. After receiving encouragement from both her older sister and former DA coach Wayne Berger, Collins started rowing for Deerfield during her freshman spring in 2012, and she quickly won a spot on the girls first boat. Impressively, only three years later, Collins has recently committed to rowing at Princeton University next fall. Coach Eve Goldenberg described Collins as “one of the most gifted athletes I have ever coached.” According to Ms. Goldenberg, “Not only is she physiologically gifted in terms of her strength, muscular and cardiovascular endurance, and awareness of how her body moves through space, she is also extremely coachable. She has the psychological and physical fitness to make important technical changes and is patient with herself in the process.” During the summer before her sophomore year–months after having started the sport–Collins earned a seat on the Junior National Team’s 8+ boat. After winning silver at the Junior World Championships in Bulgaria in 2012, she returned to place fifth in the 8+ category in Lithuania in 2013. This year, Claire won silver in Hamburg with the 4- crew, the priority boat in sweep rowing on the Junior National Team. Ms. Goldenberg attributed Collins’s success to her hunger to improve, “aligned with a strong work ethic and passion for the movement of the sport itself.” Of this experience on the Junior National team Collins said, “It was a lot of hard work, but I love being with my teammates, and I have made some of my best friends through the team. It is such a privilege to train at a high level and represent the United States.” Collins also observed, “I’ve definitely become a more confident and content person. I’ve been inspired by my teammates and the opportunities I’ve been given. I’ve learned a lot about how to prepare mentally and physically to be successful.” Collins has brought her summer experience to her Deerfield team and has inspired all the girls, as captain of the team, to tap into their potential and improve. Teammate Garam Noh ’15 remarked, “Claire is an amazing teammate. She is a natural born leader. She never has to grasp for her chances to be a leader—people automatically look to her for advice because in every practice, at every race, she herself embodies all the best values a rower could have.” This past spring, Collins helped lead the first boat to gold at the New England Interscholastic Rowing Association Regatta and then again led the boat to gold at Nationals. She is excited to work with other Deerfield rowers to achieve the same success as last year.

My experience at Deerfield can be summed up into four years of failing math and French tests—and crying in every building on campus (yes, even Johnson-Doubleday). Life at Deerfield is difficult. Once I received my acceptance letter to DA, I was pulled into a different world. I was the star at middle school, acing every test and working the hardest. But the second I unlocked my room on Mather II in 2011, I was no longer the best. I had to repeat Algebra I freshman year, something that remained a constant reminder for the rest of the year that I wasn’t as smart as I’d thought I was. I started using makeup my freshman year. I was forced into a culture in which I couldn’t be the real me. I felt inferior to the people I passed on the sidewalk every single day. I wasn’t the prettiest, the coolest or the smartest. I was just me. Thoughts of leaving school have drifted in and out of my mind as I navigate the challenges that weigh down my shoulders every day. I have been obsessed with my appearance, my grades, whether a boy liked me, and who my friends are. There is a culture here that demands that we always act like we all have everything together. As Deerfield students, we’re not allowed to have flaws. Every time I break down, shame swells inside of me. People will tell me that I’m not alone, but it’s hard to believe when you don’t see it anywhere else. I don’t know if everyone else is stronger than me or if I’m just overly sensitive. It takes merely a prick for tears to rush down my face and my breath to shorten. Each time this happens, I feel lonely, even though words of support echo in my ears. I don’t have anything together, and last year showed me that I had allowed external forces at this school to tear me apart. This school has made me feel ashamed of who I am and the amount of times that I have fallen apart. Trust me, it sucks when you start crying in the middle of a math test and everyone just stares at you like you’re crazy. Deerfield has this ability to confine one to a corner if one doesn’t adhere to its image of an ideal student, the kid who has everything together—Cum Laude, community service hours, proctor, peer counselor, DC member, captain, etc. And if you fit that mold, you are expected to be on top of your game and to never show emotions—sadness, anger, jealousy, and the rest. If you tell someone how you feel, you are ostracized, and the blame is placed upon you for feeling that way. There is no room for openness. Sometimes it feels almost like the school motto is not “Be worthy of your heritage,” but “Don’t tell me how you really feel.” Although there are the select few members of the community who will take the time to hear you out, expressing your emotions is like a cardinal sin . . . not allowed. It’s looked down upon to say that you’re going to meet with Dr. Bicknell or Dr. Fritz because people think that you’re dealing with way too many issues, or that you’re weaker than everyone else. You’re seen as a basket case or a drama queen. Nobody thinks for a second that, maybe, you just needed someone to really listen to you without judgment. I like to be open. Crying in every building on campus is something of an accomplishment, and I know, in the end, I must not be the only one who feels so lonely here sometimes. Rather than hiding behind a cloak of emotional invisibility, we here at Deerfield need to start telling people how we really feel. At moments, I have allowed my frustrations to come to a point of eruption, and when it gets to that point, those emotions are hard to deal with. The community should be accepting of every member; it shouldn’t force students to hide their true selves. Everyone should feel like they can express how they feel without being considered weak. Being unafraid to admit when you need help, when you’re having a hard time, is not cowardice. Sometimes, it’s even the braver thing to do.